Why I Ask My Significant Other For Permission…


When people read this title they are probably going to think right off the bat that I am some door mat, or that I am dating a very controlling person… and that could not be farther from the truth.

The truth is that I am with the most incredible, laid back, loving man… and we are in this together. So here is why I ask for permission, and why I willingly choose to do so!

Asking permission is respectful.

My boyfriend and I are a team — 5 years strong. We are best friends and soul mates. I ask him for permission because I respect him, I respect his feelings, and I respect his opinion. For example, maybe I forgot we had plans… asking permission will never lead to conflict the way forgetting about plans will. I ask because I respect him, and he does the same for me.

Asking permission keeps your significant other in the loop.

Like I said, my boyfriend is my best friend. I want him to know where I am, what I am doing, and who I am with. I know that if I keep him in the loop it will make him feel better, and I’ll feel more secure knowing that he knows exactly what is going on if I need him.

Asking permission shows that you trust one another.

I know that my boyfriend cares about me more than anyone else on this earth. He is such a relaxed man, so I know that if he says he is not comfortable with me going somewhere or doing something — then he must have a valid reason. Of course he wants me to have a good time, but his main priority is keeping me safe. And I trust him to do that, even when I can’t see it.

Asking permission is a form of biblical submission.

Biblical submission has this reputation for an individual being a servant in their relationship… but the way I was taught about submission, through reading God’s word, is much different. It is about respect, putting your significant other first, and doing everything you can to show them how much you love them for as long as you live. God wants submission to be a two way street !

I hope that everyone is able to find what works for them in their own relationships & continue to grow together as couples. XOXO



20 thoughts on “Why I Ask My Significant Other For Permission…

  1. I do the same thing with my husband and think that it is a sign of respect. My husband show the same respect for me, he always says let me talk to the wife before he makes any plans set in stone. Obviously I don’t ever tell him no, but he and I do it out of respect for each other.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Really appreciate your thoughts. I have a similar approach with my fiance where we communicate openly just to avoid misunderstandings, and sometimes its even made me aware of something that I didn’t realize was a bad idea until I talked it over with someone coming from a man’s point of view.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I think that you are taking positive steps toward having a strong marriage. He should ask your thoughts before making decisions too, to respect your place in his life. Learning these values now will strengthen your marriage.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I love this so much! Of course I don’t really consider it “asking for permission” as much as keeping open communication. My mom’s family used to accuse my father of being controlling because she would run things by him before committing to them. But she always raised us making the very points you’ve shared above. Thanks for writing this!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Wives be submissive to your husbands, BUT (this is the part everyone leaves out) husbands love your wives! I think Paul, in his letter to the Ephesians and using first century AD language, was clearly saying the relationship between husband and wife is mutual, albeit different. Men and women are different (and that’s okay, people), but they should equally be accountable to the other and love each other.

    Liked by 1 person

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